Turning 30

-
Saturday night it is, after a day full of happenings, I ended up watching this movie; which I wanted to since long but somehow missed it.

Turning 30 (2011) an average Bollywood movie (don't worry, this post is not a movie review ;) but more about what it made me think); somewhere pinched me. I could totally relate to the monologues of the lead throughout the movie.

Movie opens with a strong career oriented woman who is hopelessly in love with a spineless guy; who doesn't have balls to claim his love and ends up getting engaged to some other girl. Our lady , loses the guy right around her 30th birthday ; and during her break-up phase while she deals with harassment at workplace, one of her friends happens to read her random diary entries. On friend's insistence, the articles eventually shape up into a book "Turning 30".

Though movie was just an average watch, but is quite inspiring one; how to deal with failures irrespective of who understands you, which side of the table you are and where you want to go to. It's all in your head; it’s all your perspective which makes a tiny affair big thing; or treating a big deal like a mundane thing.

It’s just a few months, I turned 30; and it was surely a big deal for people around me more than it was for me. Some congratulating me while rest reminding that am running short of time for certain expected things ( I would call them "tasks" ) of life. A few wanted to make it special for me; while I was like "It's just another day in life"; and a few reminded me, somewhere I am missing the train of life; and I was like "Leave me people, it's my life let me decide what and how’s of it! " . Alas, my attempts were ignored; and people succeeded in making it special with the reminder that I need to hurry up for certain stations of the train of life. :)

The things which I failed to understand that day, understood today after watching the movie. I could totally relate to the line "There is a phase in life when no one understands you, none of your boyfriends/partners ,friends, soul buddies, parents, colleagues. , etc. actually no one means no one in the world understands you; in fact not even you yourself."  This is the time when you want things which are contradicting; which cannot co-exist in life. You might be asking for life and death simultaneously without knowing that you are asking for two things which cannot exist in your life. You have to choose one from them and live it. Icing on the cake comes, when you do not know what you want; or you want everything. At this point even tossing the coin doesn't help; as at every new iteration you are asking for something new.

For me, I still do not know what I really wish for; or may be I know and do not want to accept it. Somewhere deep down my heart, I know it but also know that the things I wish can never happen. Even a miracle cannot make it happen! And I still need to learn to deal with it. ...

Popular posts from this blog

Oops Apprendo

-
Just a few days ago, Cute Li'le Angel happened to be in the town on a business trip, and as usual, we almost fought the hectic schedule, city weather and the traffic to have a meeting for a couple of hours. Somewhere we both knew, that there is no formality of meeting, instead more a need to see each other, our own way to cope up with the fast moving life!  As usual, our conversation was much beyond about the life we are living, and more focussed on deeper thoughts. Obviously, we know each other like back of a hand, and still, love to know each other more when it comes to how we are evolving as a human being in this world. And, every interaction we have, inspires a blog here!  This time, the thing that remained was, "Learnings in life" over a cup of tea.  Guess she was not very sure, that even at this age, we are still learning about how to conduct ourselves. But for me, I was pretty sure, i have a long way to go when it comes to learning things. For me, it is more about ...
Read more

You Are More Than the Mind

-
 'The real "you" is different from those thoughts. You are reacting to every thought that visits your mind. By reacting to all of them, you are paying attention to your thoughts and feeding them, allowing them to exist. That is how a troubled mind creates a chaotic world.' This is an excerpt from a book am reading. A book which happens to be a fiction, and i didn't expect to read such a deep line in that one. It made me think, ponder upon even after days of reading the same. This is something that i learnt during Vipassana. My understanding of this is "Things keep on happening around you, whether they are good, bad or negative positive for you, completely depends on how your brain processes it, which is again dependent on what have you fed it in terms of thoughts and inputs (like reading, watching, etc).  They say, we create a version of reality in our mind, which is a product of actual happenings, our thoughts/ideas and our reactions to them. What you pay at...
Read more

An year of Metamorphosis!

-
Since the last post, life has been overhauled. It's been six months, and life is completely different now. A lot has happened in these six months, and I cannot relate to myself anymore. The person I was before April and the person I am now are two completely different human beings! Definitely, I have become more boring than earlier.  This year has been the year of firsts! Many things happened for the first time with me, and I did many new things.  Getting fired Vipassana Living in negative temperatures with basic means  Not planning anything  Noble silence for 9 days (Trust me the best time of life) Living without a phone, internet, and family  Lived at an altitude of 3500+ mtrs from sea level  Rushed mom to emergency for cardiac care Went on a trip with my Angel Welcomed a baby girl in the family. The first daughter after me! When she was born, no one in the family knew what rituals we had for a baby girl, as the ones who did all of them when I was born ar...
Read more