What's your attachment style?

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It has been 5 months, since I moved to this new city, with a new job. In these few months, met a lot of new people, colleagues, acquaintances, met old friends, who have introduced me to their new friends, thereby new set of people to mingle with! 

Some of them have already moved out also, while a few others consider themselves attached to me, which surprised me. I was astonished knowing people were actually considering me a part of their group or life if i can say that, sharing a slice of their life. For me, it wasn't new, as I have been on the receiving end like this for many years now, but every time someone did this, I wondered when can I ever be on the other side, like sharing a piece of my life with these new friends in life! Somehow, it doesn't come naturally to me. It is weird, right? The way I live my life as an open book, usually wearing my heart on my sleeves, it is practically impossible for me to pretend anything, still, i don't find it comfortable to share life. Usually, I am full of anecdotes about life, and the experiences i have gone through in life, still I don't feel like sharing life. Or in other words, I don't feel attached to anyone. I do care for people, but I am weirdly detached. 

Today when I was speaking to a long lost friend, who happens to be close, we picked up things exactly from where we had left them last (probably some 8-10 months ago), while we were discussing these patterns of being attached to people, I ended up saying, am weirdly attached but at the same detached to anyone and everyone around me. I have come to a point, where it hardly matters to me if I speak with anyone or not. All I bother is about the well-being of a few closed ones, and if someone can just share a single-line update on their well-being, probably I wont even speak with them over the phone or so. I don't remember when was the last time when I pestered someone to speak to me. Nowadays, it is more like, if you speak with me, you are welcome, and in case you don't want, I would love to wish you the best (without even interacting with you). 

This friend of mine, whom I dearly call "The Sleeping Beauty", gave me food for thought. She's the one who highlighted this and said "You are living in a wrong country and a society where you do not fit. The kind of detachment you have, you resemble more Americans than the Indians. So move out of the country, and visit someplace where you find such similar people". I couldn't agree more! At the same, we both knew this is not going to happen ever. Nevertheless, we moved onto the other part of the conversation "The attachment styles", the real reason for writing this blog. She suggested doing an analysis or assessment to identify my attachment styles, and the results were as weird as I am! The results were exactly the opposite of how my personality is! The results inclined towards being disorganized, avoidant and fearful! And we had laughed out loud, as in her opinion, am anything but neither of these three. Not sure how correct the assessment was. 

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